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Tuesday, July 24, 2007  

TADPOLE REDEEMED

I'D LIKE TO OFFER MY THANKS TO THE PROGRAMMING GODS FOR CONTINUING TO SERVE UP "AGE OF LOVE" EVERY MONDAY NIGHT. I THINK I'M REALLY GOING TO MISS IT WHEN IT'S OVER. LAST NIGHT OUR TADPOLE BACHELOR TOOK THE REMAINING FIVE WOMEN (3 OLDER, 2 YOUNGER) ON A CAMPING TRIP. NOW RIGHT THERE I STARTED TO GET A LITTLE BIT EXCITED, BECAUSE A BUNCH OF WOMEN IN THE ROUGH IS THE PERFECT BACKDROP FOR THE INEVITABLE DISASTER. FRANKLY, MY IDEA OF ROUGHING IT IS BEING IN A HOTEL ROOM WITHOUT A REMOTE CONTROL. THAT'S CHALLENGING. THE FIRST SQUIRMY MOMENT BELONGED TO MARIA, WHO OOZED BREATHLESS ANTICIPATION AS SHE DECLARED THIS WOULD GIVE MARK, OUR TADPOLE, THE OPPORTUNITY TO CREATE A LOT OF "YUMMIE-NESS". WHAT??? SO, AFTER A FEW DRINKS, OUR GROUP OPTS FOR A GAME OF "TRUTH OR DARE" AND JAYANNA (39) VOLUNTEERS TO SHOW HER ASS. AT FIRST I THOUGHT THIS IS REALLY A BOLD MOVE, THEN I REALIZED THERE WAS NO WAY TO STOP HER FROM SHOWING HER ASS, GIVING HER ENTRY TO THE DESPERATION HALL OF FAME, JOINING THE LIKES OF BRIDGET NEILSON AND ANN COLTER. SHE WAS SO CONFIDENT THAT HER ASS WOULD MAKE THE DIFFRENCE, BUT FATE STEPPED IN AND HER OVERLY CONFIDENT ATTITUDE CAME BACK TO BITE HER RIGHT IN HER PERFECT ASS. SHE WAS SENT PACKING. MARIA, WHOKEEPS SAYING THIS GUY IS NOT FOR HER, IS STILL IN THE RUNNING. WHEN SHE GOT HER MOMENT ALONE WITH THE TADPOLE IN THE WOODS, SHE WANTED HIM TO KNOW "HER TRUTH", BUT WAS ONLY ABLE TO TELL IT WHILE STRADDLING HIS LAP. INCREDIBLY, THIS IS THE MOMENT WHEN THE BACHELOR REDEEMED HIMSELF. HE SAYS HE IS DRAWN TO MARIA BECAUSE SHE "IS WHO SHE IS AND IS VERY COMFORTABLE WITH HERSELF". NOW WE ARE FINALLY GETTING TO THE REASON WHY THE OLDER WOMAN IS SO ALLURING. OUR TADPOLE IS ENLIGHTENED!!






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